Speak now
by LadyPalma
Summary: It's Isobel's wedding with Lord Merton, but doctor Clarkson might decide at the last moment that he isn't actually fine with that. Inspired by an article read on tumblr and the song "Speak now" by Taylor Swift.
1. Chapter 1

_**Speak now**_

 **Part 1**

 ** _I am not the kind of guy_**  
 ** _Who should be rudely barging in on a white veil occasion_**  
 ** _But you are not the kind of girl_**  
 ** _Who should be marrying the wrong boy_**

* * *

He showed up in Church in the end, after collecting the invitation from the garbage bin where he had thrown it. Just to give a look: that was the poor excuse he had repeated to himself, but that didn't actually explain why he decided to sit down, ready to attend the whole ceremony, or why he had dressed up so well. He looked almost more handsome than the groom - _almost_ because that day he was a shadow anyway, while all the eyes were currently on the predictably excited Lord Merton. From his half hidden seat on one of the further bench from the altar, he could actually see everything: the servants of the Abbey right in front of them, then the whole Grantham family laughing together over something, some nobles he had had the chance to see somehow or others completely strangers, but most of all Merton's snotty little family showing overconfidence even at that distance.

In spite of the undeniable pang of pain in his chest, Richard had chosen to stay there. However, it was only when he heard the well known numptial march and was forced to stood up by inertia, that he understood why. Not long after, Isobel appeared from the door, alone and only preceeded by her young grandson as her pageboy; her pace wasn't steady and she looked nervous, but she was beautiful as always and maybe in that light blue dress even a bit more. For a moment, he dared to ask himself if the reason of her uncertainty was just normal emotion or maybe an actual second thought about the wedding itself; for a moment, he dared to daydream about the chance of being in the groom's place. That little fantasy hurt none the less, and hurt twice to see that she didn't even try to look for him into the crowd. But he was also glad of that though, because he knew that meeting her eyes would have been too much to bear.

He sat down imitating once again the rest of the people, but the principle of inertia couldn't work with his ears. He managed not to listen to any word of the function and instead let himself got lost inside his mind a little more. No hopes this time, no fantasies: just unfulfilled questions, lost chances, buried feelings and too many things left unspoken.

" _Speak now or forever hold your peace_ "

He didn't know why but he was able to catch clearly that solemn sentence, which was able immediately to shook him from his gloomy paralisys. Or maybe it was the full silence, or the bride's now wandering eyes or his own hammering heart. But what really pushed him in the end to action was something bigger than fear and despair and even bigger than love. It was a curios mixture of pride and annoyance, as his eyes crossed for a single moment Lady Violet's challenging glare and at once her last words to him echoed in his mind…

* * *

 ***THREE DAYS BEFORE***

" _I am here to make sure you will come to the wedding…"_

 _One hand resting on her hip, the other holding the knob of her black stick: that's how Violet Crawley was standing right in front of the doctor's desk, waiting for a reply to her suggestion – even if actually it sounded more as a command._

 _But unlucky for her, Richard had learnt through the years how to handle the dowager countess' famous fierce character and now he knew that, if he couldn't avoid her lectures, at least he could avoid her subtle intimidation by avoiding her gaze. So, lowering his eyes as soon as he could, he just shrugged slightly and managed to make a small smile._

" _I don't think it is your job to give invitations in place of the happy couple, or maybe is it?"_

 _She frowned for a moment, confused by the meaning of that remark. But, when she actually grasped it – or at least thought that she had –, she widened her eyes and took instictively a step forward. "Are you telling me that Mrs Crawley hasn't invited you to the wedding?" Her surprise, so evident both in the face and in the voice, was so much that she probably didn't even aknowledge the not too polite way the doctor had just spoken to her._

" _Of course, she has!" he replied quickly though, "it's just that I don't think it would be appropriate for me to be present. Trust me, my Lady, it is better for everyone if I don't attend this wedding."_

 _Violet relaxed immediately and relaxing for her meant regaining her usual stern composure. Far from being discouraged by his obvious little collaborative behavior, she found a new confidence in her purpose instead. And that was the reason why she decided to push her luck a bit more. "Better for whom? Listen, Doctor Clarkson, I am perfectly aware of your feelings for my cousin, you can't deny that…"_

 _He didn't even try in fact, remaining in silence just long enough to let her understand that she had hit the point. Then, he suddenly let out a brief joyless chuckle, which let his annoyance show probably more than his previous brusque answers. "Then, if you know, how can you expect me to see her marrying another?" In spite of the blunt words, he managed to maintain a calm voice. However, in the meanwhile, he made the terrible mistake to look up._

" _On no, dear Doctor, I am asking you to come not to attend the wedding, but to stop it!" the countess exclaimed immediately, taking the chance to meet his eyes and finally perform her intimidating glare._

 _Maybe it was for the forward unexpected suggestion or maybe it was for that look, but Richard, in misdt of his growing irritation, had the decency to blink twice in clearly discomfort. "Honestly, Lady Grantham, do you think I am_ the kind of man who should be rudely barging in on a white veil occasion _?" he asked eventually, with a sort of painful irony filling his voice._

 _But if he sounded amused by that prospect, she looked for the first time completely serious, as her gaze faded into an empathetic one. "No, you are not, but Isobel is not_ the kind of woman who should be marrying the wrong man _…" Just as that meaningful whisper left her mouth, she cleared her troat and, abandoning once again her soft side, she bid him goodbye and, before he could say anything, turned in order to leave._

 _Once she reached the door though, she turned around again and revealed a triumphant smile that she was probably waiting to make since the very start of that conversation. "Just remember that I haven't come back all the way from France to see this!"_

 _Thoughtful, confused and upset, Richard just watched the womanleave without any reaction and, only when the door was closed and he was left alone in his office, he found himself awakened enough to slowly sit down. A slight tiny hope was creeping inside him after that visit, he could tell that, as the actual image of himself running to Crawley House right in that moment and confessing his feelings to Isobel formed in his mind. But as soon as it appeared, he sighed angrily and purposely started to look for a particular invitation card among the many papers on the messy desk. Despite the chaos, he found it soon: "Lord Richard Merton and Mrs Isobel Crawley are glad to announce their wedding"; he looked at it for some moments, then rolled his eyes and just threw it in the garbage bin._

* * *

Despite his inner state of anxiety, Richard managed to hold the dowager's look and unexpectedly found himself nodding at her silent request. He was surely not the kind of person to ruin a formal occasion or even to attract the general attention, but honestly, he knew that there was too much at stake and too little time left to care about reputation, embarassment or other people's judgement. After all, he owed a little show to Lady Violet, didn't he?

Reverend Travis had already started to talk and the two spouses-to-be were looking at each other again, when the doctor suddenly stood up, not even realizing it or more probably chosing not to think about it. He heard some gasps in surprise and was also sure to be receiving horrified looks from – almost – everyone in the room, but in that precise moment only Isobel and her astonished face existed for him. A face he found the courage to nervously smile to.

"Actually, I fear I can _not_ hold my peace…"

* * *

 **Hello dear richobels, I'm back with a new story that will probably consist of 4 parts. "But Dr. Clarkson might interrupt the wedding to declare his undying love for her": I read this sentence in an article and then, combining it with a male cover of Taylor Swift's "Speak now", this (silly) plot came out. lol I am well aware that even if Richobel will happen, this is not likely to be the way, but we can still dream in fanfiction, can't we? I hope you'll let me know what you think about it and that you are interested in reading the next chapters:)**


	2. Chapter 2

_**Speak now**_

 **Part 2**

Richard was smiling. It was a little, bitter and uncertain smile, but indeed it was a smile and it was all for her. She couldn't return it though; instead, the only thing she did for at least a whole minute was staring blankly at him, as if she were seeing him for the first time. And actually it was a bit like that, because she had never seen him so inconsiderate, bold and even passionate as in that very moment.

A part of her had been secretly wishing for him to do something like that, but she never expected that fantasy to become concrete. The whole place seemed to freeze and time seemed to freeze as well, as her heart started to burn in her chest instead. Why was she suddenly feeling that way? It was a very long time since she had even felt her heart beating and now there was an upcoming explosion that she didn't know how to handle. _I_ _recognize the signs of that old flame_ – that particular verse of Virgil crossed her mind – as the truth of the hidden feelings that linked her to her dear friend was finally uncovering in front of her eyes. And he hadn't even said anything yet.

"Doctor Clarkson… What does this mean?" the Reverend asked, breaking the heavy silence. He looked shocked, but surely was the less shocked of all anyway.

Richard swallowed hard and was forced for a moment to look down at his own shaking hands. He perfectly knew what to say, but sadly he didn't know how. Somehow, interrupting a wedding sounded a lot easier than confessing his feelings, just as many years before in Thirsk, it had been easier to blurt out an improper marriage proposal. His confidence was wavering once again, but on the other hand he knew that now he was having a second chance, his _last_ chance, and he just couldn't waste it. So, he looked up quickly and fixed his eyes again on the bride.

"Mrs Crawley… " he began in a low voice, but then cleared his throat and tried to speak louder, until he found hismelf almost screaming. "Mrs Crawley, Isobel… I am sorry if I am ruining this day for you, but I… i love you, I am in love with you and I've been in love with you for years now. I am not asking you to do anything, I just wanted you to know before… Well, before you marry another man"

Not asking her to do anything?As if that was possible! A slight irritation joined the fragile mix of all her other current emotions. It took years for him to say those feelings aloud, it took years for her to realize that she had feelings for him as well, and now what? After his insane action, was he really going to leave her standing as a fool? But then, he was standing as a fool too. She wanted to laugh, get angry at him or at least say something at all that could save that situation, but instead she remained still and silent. Her emotional and physical paralysis only allowed her to move her eyes all over the crowd gathered in the Church, and that was when she actually felt shame raining on her. Shame for being at the centre of unwanted attention, shame for living such a show at her age, shame for having to display her heart after she had kept locked it for so long.

Everyone looked shocked, but most of all curious, – except for Larry Grey and his future wife, who were both staring at her with disgust. She could almost ranaway just to make an act of spite to them – she though ironically, but didn't laugh not even this time.

"Darling, what does this all mean?" Lord Merton asked at some point, ever politely even in that situation. He slightly touched her arm, gently forcing her to look away from the other Richard.

She did look away abruptly, but meeting her fiancè's green hurt eyes didn't make things easier. It was like she was realizing only then that it was not only about herself or Richard, but Dickie was put in an uncomfortable place as well, and the worst part was that the only person in that triangle that could make a move was her. She didn't want that power though, she didn't want to answer – not to Richard, not to Dickie. After hearing a shocking news like that and while everyone was staring at her, it was difficult to choose between doing the right thing and following her heart. But then again, which was the right thing to do? And what was really her heart saying?

"I don't- I… I didn't expect this at all" she stammered eventually, showing a vulnerability so unlike of her.

Dickie nodded in understanding. "Well, of course… But you don't feel the same for him, do you?"

The bride flushed irrimediably, as she lost another considerable amount of control. "Dickie, I don't-"

"Of course you don't, Isobel!" he interrupted her, nodding again. For him, everything seemed already figured out, but how could it be when she didn't know herself what to do? "Just tell him to leave, so we can go on with our wedding…"

"Well, I…" she tried to say weakly, but was interrupted again. This time not by her official fiancè though.

"Oh for Heaven's sake! Lord Merton, just let her answer properly to our good doctor!"

Too focused on putting an answer together, Isobel didn't expect at all the intrusion; she turned around just in time to catch Violet's determined look and the disapproving one of her son, as he was trying to make her sit down again.

But looking at Violet meant looking again at the crowd, at what had become her family, at all the other familiar faces… It meant looking again at Richard. If she could actually decide, she knew that she couldn't do that in that very moment, because people was watching and she was too overwhelmed to even breathe. She was simply stuck: she couldn't walk away with Richard, but she couldn't let him go and marry Dickie either.

"I… I need a moment" she managed to say finally, to no one in particular.

Without looking at anyone – especially not to the both hurt men –, she started to walk quickly, headed to the side exit. The only thing that she truly wanted in that moment was to disappear and so she did the most diplomatic and sensible thing she could do: she ranaway – alone.

* * *

 **They couldn't have a happy ending just yet, right? Thanks so much for the reviews, hope you liked this chapter as well:)**


	3. Chapter 3

_**Speak now**_

 **Part 3**

Outside the Church, everything seemed to take another meaning and the actual entity of his action was hitting him hard. Every single guest to the wedding was silently throwing side glances at him while leaving - or so he guessed, because he didn't dare to look up and, actually, he felt that he would have never been able to do that anymore. Honestly, a part of him was regretting his choice to come. What was he thinking, that for a moment of bravery he would have won Isobel's heart and they would have lived happily ever after? Well, now he was left alone, full of doubts and with no one to blame except himself and his own stupid mouth. He couldn't have even pretended to blame abuse of alcohol this time; quite the contrary, he had been too lucid and that was exactly the problem. He had felt like he had nothing to lose, but now was sadly discovering that he could have potentially destroyed the two most important things in his life: his reputation as sensible man and the friendship with the woman he loved.

Probably, Isobel wasn't going to forgive him; surely, people weren't going to forget.

He wanted to leave in order to spare himself more minutes of general pity, but it was only when he saw no one else coming out the main entrance of the building that he decided to move. His hope kept him in place, his foolish wish to see her appear at any moment forced him to wait a little longer. And that was why, when after taking some steps he felt a hand on his arm, he stopped immediately and turned around abruptly with a certain expectation.

"Lady Grantham" he said with a deep sigh, failing miserably at concealing his disappointment. "It seems our plan did not work out" he continued then, with a hint of bitterness in the voice.

"Who said that? The game is not over yet!" Violet replied, showing instead an unchanged determination, soon confirmed by a sort of reproachful glare. "And don't you tell me that you are going away now that you are so close to win!"

"What makes you so sure that she will pick me?"

In front of his still discouraged expression, the woman just slightly shrugged and offered him a smile. "Well, all I know is that _I_ would runaway with you, doctor Clarkson!"

Richard eyed her curiosly for some moments and then, repressing the instict to roll his eyes, smirked back at her amusingly. After all, it was a good reason to hope indeed.

* * *

A soft knock on the door broke into the bubble of peace that Isobel had created around herself. She had asked for a moment alone, and yet that moment had turned into many more, even if she couldn't say how many exactly. Moments spent in silence, mostly thinking about the absurd twist of events and kinda hiding herself from the rest of the world. But with that knock, the world was coming to get her and she wasn't ready to face it yet, so she just sighed in frustration and tried to ignore it for a little longer.

Another louder knock and her sigh became louder as well.

"Plase, leave me alone, Violet. I am in no mood for-"

"Oh, cousin Isobel, I think you are mistaking me for the wrong Crawley"

She had thought until that moment that nothing could have led her to open the door, but yet she was finding an exception now. After hearing the soft and totally unexpected voice, she blinked twice in surprise but still didn't hesitate much before giving the consense to come in. Of all the people she may have guessed, the young woman that slowly entered the room was the last she had in mind, but as isobel was realizing only in that moment, probably the only one she would have allowed to see her in that situation.

Sitting on the floor, with puffy red eyes of now dry tears, and a blank face: that was how Lady Edith found her and, according to her kind and empathetic smile, she wasn't expecting a different sight.

"They are all talking about me, aren't they?" Isobel asked, surprisingly being the first to break the silence.

Edith nodded in confirmation with a small sigh and just remained silent for a short while, during which she sat down on the floor as well. "But don't worry, they will forget about it eventually… I know very well how interrupted weddings work" she added then, covering with an ironic chuckle the unavoidable hint of bitterness in the voice.

The older woman frowned in confusion, but it didn't take long for her to widen her eyes in sudden realization. Thinking about it now, it didn't seem so strange that the unluckiest Crawley girl was the first who dared to actually talk to her. "Of course you are, dear, I am sorry" she whispered sincerely and she didn't even know what she was apologizing for.

Maybe because yes, they had lived a similar situation, but their roles were exactly the years before Edith had been the one to be pitied, Isobel was feeling now like the one to be blamed; without actually doing anything, she was feeling like being the villain of her own fairytale.

"No need for that. Now I honestly think that it was for the best" the younger woman kindly replied though. "At first, when Anthony left me on the altar, I felt only the shame, the betrayal and that huge sense of abandon. I thought that he didn't love me enough, but then I realized how much a fool I was because he loved me too much, actually…" she continued in a sad tone. It was surely pain for her to bring up the subject and talk about it so openly maybe really for the first time, but somehow it was a detached pain now, a pain balanced by a new awareness. "He wasn't afraid of interrupting the ceremony, he wasn't afraid of making a fool of himself. He left me because he thought that it was the best for me, that I could have had other chances to be happy and, well, he was right. I suffered of course, but I grew and learnt and found reasons to be happy eventually. I found love again, I have a wonderful job, I have Marigold and… And I'm just happy over all. I am happy and I have to thank Anthony for that, isn't it ironic?"

Isobel had looked at her all the while in authentic suprise at that unexpected but beautiful confession. She was happy for her, having been a witness herself of that amazing path that led Edith to turn from the ugly duckling of the family into a beautiful swan; but also, those words were working somehow as a balm for her own current feelings. "So you really don't blame him anymore?" she asked, with sincere curiosity.

"No, I don't" Edith simply answered, pausing for some seconds, as if she was finally silently closing in her mind that chapter of her life. Then, she suddenly shook her head and offered the almost- bride a new smile. "Do you know why I am telling you all of this?"

"Maybe because it was thanks to what happened today that you had this realization? Something good came out of this at least…"

Unexpectedly, Edith let out a loud laugh, a sincere one that Isobel had not seen often on her lips. "This is not about me, this is about you" she explained then, somehow amused. She had never been at the centre of attention in her whole life and now it was kinda funny that the person who was giving her an actual consideration, was the one that she was trying to give an advice to. "What I'm trying to say is that you should do what you think is right for you… Doctor Clarkson hasn't been afraid to speak up to tell you how he feels and if you feel the same for him, you don't have to worry about anything else. Lord Merton will understand, everyone will understand"

"Maybe" Isobel sighed, not sounding much convinced. Maybe it was true that everyone would have understood eventually, but the problem was that she was the one who still couldn't understand. Was it possible that Richard Clarkson had been in love with her all this time and she had just been too blind to see? Was it possible that she herself was in love with him as well? Was it possible to discover it all in a theatrical way like that? She was still expecting to find out that the whole situation had been just a dream or a silly joke. As she shook her head in the vain attempt to make the absurdity disappear, suddenly it was her turn to chuckle. "Don't you think that it is silly of me to marry for love at my age?"

In that moment, she almost looked like a little girl ready to be scolded, but far from that Edith just looked back at her with fondness and took her hands in hers own. "Honestly, Cousin Isobel, especially at your age, why should someone marry _at all_ if not for love?"

* * *

 **First of all, thanks for the reviews as always!:) No Richobel yet in this chapter, as I decided that Isobel needed a little push and why don't let Edith be that push? I loved the relationship between Edith and Anthony Strallan, so I hope you don't mind the hint I made to Andith. See you soon with the last part!**


	4. Chapter 4

_**Speak now**_

 **Part 4**

It took all the rest of the day for Isobel to finally leave the small room she had decided to seclude herself in. She hadn't been waiting for any sudden revelation nor for a particular moment, the only thing she had been looking for was silence. In fact, it was only when the knocks on her door stopped – likely thanks to Edith – and no voices could be heard at all anymore, that she decided to stand up from the floor and actually prepare to leave. Firstly, she removed her wedding dress and changed into her more ordinary clothes; then she collected her few things and so, in a matter of minutes, she had her hand on the handle of the door.

With surprising carefreeness she opened it and started to move quickly, walking through again the now empty Church. It came as a relief the first step out of the building, it came as a relief the cold blow of wind that hit her face: it was like she had left her heavy thoughts in that place and in that moment she didn't mind. Her mind was tired and her heart had been put to rest; she knew what to do and where she had to go, but the relief was that she didn't have to act right then. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, as a tiny unaware smile appeared on her lips. For that moment she just wanted to focus on the unexpected inward peace she had achieved, for a moment she just wanted to enjoy the silence.

"Isobel"

She opened her eyes immediately and slightly startled as she heard her name filling that same air she was breathing. And once she recognized the familiar source of that call, instead of calming down, she actually seemed more anxious.

"Richard, you are still here" she said in a whisper, not hiding her surprise – and also, a somewhat hint of disappointment. The Hell with peace, indeed!

He stepped forward in her direction, but just enough to reveal his presence completely. "Of course I am here, I was waiting for you" he simply replied, holding her gaze with calm determination.

He didn't look embarassed nor on the contrary bold, she noted, he just looked tired and somehow resigned. Outside the Church, for all that time, he had been waiting too; not for silence, but on the exact contrary for words – _her_ words. But those words were words she wasn't ready to say aloud yet, and so she almost snapped, showing boiled anger where he was showing a sort of cold control – maybe _because_ of his cold control.

"Well, _Doctor Clarkson_ , maybe you should have just gone away immediately after the show you put up today. Have you got any idea of how people looked at me or what they will think now?"

"Oh, but I do. You are the one who doesn't have any idea, actually, since you have locked yourself all day inside a room!" he exclaimed back quickly and accuratedly, but still managing to sound calm. "And besides, since when do you care about what people say? You are already thinking as a noblewoman maybe…"

A tiny smile appeared on his lips as he couldn't help but tease her, even if just as he was beginning, he decided to stop already. Suddenly approaching her more, he just raised slowly a hand in the air, in order to stop with the gesture the surely unfriendly retort that she was about to make. "Listen, Isobel, I don't want to fight with you. Honestly I just want to apologize for my actions, I ruined your wedding day and I had no rights to do that" he said then, and that was when the hint of resignation returned to show. "It was selfish of me and I am sorry. Probably I shouldn't have said anything at all, I should have tried to be happy for you, I should-"

"You should have told me before!" she interrupted, reaching a new level of anger which was now mixed with hurt. She paused for a moment and let out a sharp joyless laugh, as she shook her head in incredulity. "And now you are apologizing. Honestly, Richard? You stopped my wedding and claimed that you loved me and now you are changing your mind or what? Do you even know what you want?"

Richard widened his eyes and finally, for the first time during that confrontation, a flash of pure irritation crossed them. "I want _you_ , Isobel! I stopped the wedding because I couldn't bear to lose you. As far as it may seem absurd, I wanted to runaway with you and I still want to" he declared, taking her hands in his, while showing a passion even greater than the one he had showed in Church. More than what he said, it was the way he said it that made her swallow hard and blink for a couple of times, totally overwhelmed. "The problem is what do _you_ want? Because if it's not me, I can manage to be fine with it, I-"

Isobel interrupted him once again, but not with words this time. Almost throwing herself at him, she let her lips crash against his ones, not even fearing for a second of being rejected. In fact, after a first moment of surprise, he didn't hesitate to deepen the kiss, taking the iniziative to let now their tongues meet as well. Breaking the contact between their hands, he gently put them around her waist, attracting her more to him. It was a luck that no one else was around in that moment, but, honestly, they probably wouldn't have cared anyway.

"Oh, Richard, you annoying but wonderful man" she whispered against his lips, raising one hand to touch his cheek. "I can see now why I love you so much"

At that explicit confession, he just smiled out of sincere happiness and also relief. He kissed her again, softly and quickly this time and used that kiss as only comment. "So, what are we going to do now?"

Isobel pursed her lips and pretended to think about it for a moment. "Well, I think you should go now and I think that I should go with you…"

He nodded in agreement and didn't hide a sort of mischievous smirk. "And tell me, Isobel, am I too forward if I suggest for us to go to my cottage?"

"Not at all. Actually, I suggest that we should lock ourselves in there until rumors won't end" she replied giggling and in that giggle there was an evident trace of mischievousness as well.

"You know that could take forever, do you?" he teased, pushing their little game a bit more.

A quick complicit exchange of looks and another soft kiss, before they linked their arms together and actually started to walk away, finally together.

Forever sounded like a good plan after all.

 ** _And you say: "Let's run away now,_**  
 ** _I'll meet you when I'm out of my tux at the back door,_**  
 ** _Oh baby, I didn't say my vow,_**  
 ** _So glad you were around when they said, "Speak now"_**

 **THE END**

* * *

 **And we have reached the end of this story as well! I love to see them argue a bit, but of course give them a happy ending then. I want to thank all the people who have followed/favorited/reviewed so far and I'd like to receive a feedback for this last chapter as well:)**

 **I don't mean to scare you (lol), but I have many other ideas - serious and a bit crazy ones - for this ship, so see you soon with more!;)**


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